Create a Not To-do list or a Boundary List

A lot have been written on keeping focus, maintaining a task list or most important item list and prioritization and but little emphasis has been given on what Not To do list or boundary list.

If you are a normal person like me, you probably have a To Do List. You may also have your projects or focus areas. Do you have a Not To-do List or boundary list?

A Not To-do list is the items which you do not want to do (probably never want to do). Keeping a boundary list is very useful in reminding me that what are my time waters or energy drainer actions or relationship destroyer items and you can try to avoid these in future.

One day I came to home early around 6 pm so that I can play with my 5 years old daughter. When I entered the home, I was on a call so I just waved my hand to my daughter and went to my room to finish the call. My intention was to finish the call so that I can spend the time with her without any disturbance. My call finished in just 1 or 2 minutes and I came out of room, but my daughter was upset. Her mood recovered soon but I was astonished to see that not giving full attention for 1 minute when I meet affected the mood of my 5 years old daughter. I am sure she would not have noticed or angry if I would have entered my house 2 or event 5 minutes late. So I decided that I will not do that. Later I found a video about 90 seconds rule. But where do I add that. How do I remember that? That’s when I started my Not To-do list.

Let me share 10 of the items I have in my Not To-do list or Boundary List:

1. Do not be on phone when entering home and there is someone in home
2. Do not do multitasking. Unless muscle reflection, multitasking is a myth
3. Do not go to bed with bad or depressing mood
4. Do not spend more than 12 hours in a week on TV, Entertainment and Social Media
5. Do not cancel my weekly team meeting
6. Do not cancel my Buddy call (yes- I have a buddy and we discuss important topics 30-60 minutes weekly basis)
7. Do not check my phone every 30 minutes (temptation to check new emails, message, tweet or Facebook post)
8. Do not miss my weekly review
9. Do not break a promise however small it may look. If broken, re-establish agreement.
10. Do not cheat government, legal, compliance and tax departments

What is your view or experience with Not To-do list? Do you have something which you think could be a good Not To-do List item?

Top 10 inspirational quotes

I personally believe each of us needs a dose of motivation or inspiration. I have my goals and objectives. I do prioritize things on daily, weekly, monthly and yearly basis. Sometimes I drop the ball but most of the times I do regular review of my goals and objectives. I do read insightful books. Even then once in a while, I experienced really depressed, lost and do not want to do anything. Sounds familiar?

I believe every human being faces the situation when you are sitting on a sofa or a couch and just feeling depressed. In spite of all the knowledge, information, wisdom and experience you have, you do not want to do anything or take any action. If you have a friend (or coach or buddy or someone else) with you feel emotionally safe and you are comfortable to share what you are really struggling with, go and talk to him or her.

There were times when I was in similar situation but I am not in situation to connect to my friend. This is because of it is late in night and I do not want to disturb at mid night or I am out of station or they are out of station. One of the things I found useful in that situation is my personal quote list. I did mention in my previous post that I have a habit of collecting good quotes. I am not suggesting searching internet and collecting good quotes, what I find useful for me to collect any good quotes which I have come across while reading a book, an article or listening a podcast. When I collect a quote, occasionally I write a small note sharing my experience of insights I acquire from the quote.

You can also use Internet to search for thousands of quotes of motivation and inspiration but I found my personal quotes more useful. I find it much more effective and efficient to look at my selected few quotes where I have some personal experience/insights  as compared to looking at thousand of quotes which some of them are completely irrelevant for me or does not inspire me at all.

None of them is my quote and I give credit to people who wrote it. Here is my top 10

1. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

2. It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.

3. When you go in search of honey you must expect to be stung by bees.

4. What we can or cannot do, what we consider possible or impossible, is rarely a function of our true capability. It is more likely a function of our beliefs about who we are.

5. The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind.

6. Adversity causes some men to break; others to break records.

7. Big men become big by doing what they didn’t want to do when they didn’t want to do it.

8. Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.

9. You have to have a darkness…for the dawn to come.

10. You can never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

What is your favourite quote?

5 methods for converting knowledge into wisdom

“Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing that a tomato doesn’t belong in a fruit salad”

I read this quote and it simply got me thinking for few minutes. I decided to reflect on some of my experiences.

Knowledge and Wisdom could have several meaning. I describe knowledge as something you gather from learning, education, training, or reading type activities. Wisdom is applicability of knowledge with combination of your memory, conscience, emotional stability, and gut feeling. Of course, there are other elements which affect your wisdom but I am going to focus on understanding and applicability of knowledge in life: This is what I refer to converting knowledge into wisdom.

Knowledge: gathered from learning and training and coaching
Wisdom: comes from day to day experiences. A state of being wise.

“Smoking is dangerous to health” is printed on every single cigarette box in this world but people do smoke it. Some people are heavy smokers. Why? All of them have this knowledge but they still smoke. So Knowledge alone does not make big difference. It require much more than knowledge to not to smoke which is Wisdom.

I am writing this blog for normal people much like me who read book, attend training, and engage in active discussion with friends and colleagues to find ways to be a better person or a better human or to live a better life.

5 methods which I have experienced and enhanced my ability to convert knowledge into wisdom. There are many other methods but I found these 5 as most effective for me.

1. Take Notes: Physical or digital, do take notes. This is for me the most important and foremost method. It has been proven scientifically that an average human mind can remember only very limited percentage (5 or 10% max) after 24 hours. So take notes to capture a thought, a quote, an idea, or an insight.

Taking note has four major benefits

1) It clears your mind

2) It shows importance of the topic to other people when you are in meeting/discussion

3) It can be referred in future as human mind can’t retain all in memory

4) It could be a used a weapon in your outreach armory

Let me deep dive in fourth benefits in particular. If you store your notes of the book you have read, good quotes you saw/read, and insights you have about yourself and stories which inspired you. If all of these are available into a common notebook/application, this is your secret and valuable weapon which you can against yourself in positive way. When you are not so encouraged or not in a great time or feeling low, take this notebook or application and start reading this collection. In my opinion, everybody needs some dose of inspiration once in a while. I have found this very useful in my life.

I strongly recommend a common place for storing your notes. Smart phones and tablet have made this so easy. I used to add those quotes in a Microsoft PowerPoint presentation. Now I am storing in Evernote application. I still have to combine migrate old quotes from Microsoft PowerPoint to Evernote.  So start taking notes.

2. Ask question to yourself or speculate: When I read anything great, I ask myself – can I apply this into life? Is there anything I can do better using knowledge I just acquired? You got to articulate and look for possible applicability in past, present and future. Ask yourself questions like – “Could I have applied in past?”. Or “Can I apply in any situation I have in hand or I am going to face in future?”

I had a meeting schedule with a senior manager. Just day before this meeting, I was reading something interesting about marketing, which was totally irrelevant for this meeting but I ask can I apply somewhere. And I decide to apply into this meeting. Although I could not apply as I was expected but I enjoyed the process. I will share his into more detail in next method. So ask question to yourself.

3. Discuss with friend, mentor or colleague: This is very effective. I strongly suggest to share what you see or what you understand and ask you colleague or friend to share what they see or understand. Ask what you would have applied this in past situation? Now I do not go to anyone and ask for their advice or view. I do have a circle of professional and personal network and I do discuss with few of them more often as compared with some of others. However, I do often (almost daily) discuss my insights, my experiences, quotes with my wife. Sometime she is little frustrated as I have a tendency to go in very details but most of the time she is willing to listen to me and share her thoughts. I do have some great friends with whom I discuss. So to summarize, discuss with friends, mentor, colleague or wife – whosoever you think can contribute but do share your views.

4. Try it: This is no brainer. You got to try it. Unless you try, you are not in game. You are like a spectator who is standing in the stadium or like a player who is getting ready for the game. If you want to win the game, you have to play the game. Now it is not sure if you will get success of failure but this is sure that playing will make you a better player and your chances to win in next game will increase because you are now a better player.

Btw it is very easy to tell someone what to do (knowledge) compared to do in real situation (wisdom). So if you are watching a game played by someone else, do not condemn (or angry with) them for their mistake. Being in court to play itself is very courageous and warrants appreciation. Just remind yourself that “It is so easy to give advice to others but difficult to follow yourself.”

As I mentioned in method 2 above, I read an article which I decided to apply for a meeting scheduled with a senior manager. I prepared for meeting with all agenda items and my notes were front of me during meeting. It was a telephonic call so I have no one looking at me. I started perfectly but within 5 minutes I was much diverted from my agenda. We finished on time and it was a good meeting but I could not apply knowledge I learned. But I tried. I look for reflection which is my fourth method. But I tried. Similarly you have to try. You will meet sweet success and sour failures but you got to try. There is no alternative.

5. Review: I find review is the only method to improve further. After attempting to apply the knowledge, review it. Did it work? What did not work? How would you do it differently in future?

When I did a review of my meeting with senior manager and reflected on what went wrong and what did I learn. I learned that I probably need to go slow for next meeting. I was too excited to share my view and difference it could make, I could slow down my speaking in my next meeting. I could also prepare a slide for next meeting to support my thoughts/idea. So review when you try something new. You may not only discover why these did not work but can also find a new insight which could be something new for next time. It could be that you only require some adjustments based on need of the other person.

I do weekly review of my task, goals etc and as part of process is to capture 3 things/behaviour/actions which worked during last week and another 3 things/behaviour/actions which did not work last week. This is integral part of the review and one of the sections I really enjoy.

Being honest, this is something I have adapted around 6 months ago and I find it very insightful. Again, I am using another tool for this but I am intended to migrate this into Evernote for the same reason I explained earlier. I am not promoting Evernote, it is just one tool which I use a lot and have fallen in love with it. You may decide to review daily or weekly or at any other frequency.

Just to summarize, 5 methods for converting knowledge into wisdom are
1. Take Notes
2. Ask question to yourself or speculate
3. Discuss with a friend, mentor or colleague
4. Try it
5. Review

So let’s change the role and let me ask you.

 “What other methods you know or used to convert knowledge into wisdom?” Please leave your comments and thoughts.

6 Steps to take more risks in life and get closer to your dreams

How do you see yourself- risk taker or risk averse? All of us take risk in life although attitude towards risks are different for individuals. Some of us take more risk and some of us less. But all of us do take it and it has been well established that risk taking is essential part of life development.

Good news is that you can take more risk, reduce probability and damage by taking some steps mentioned in this blog. And if you are reading this blog, this means you already took the risk of reading this blog. At this moment, you do not know if this post can alter your life by providing you something new which you do not know already or it is one of many posts appears daily on internet. You took a risk of reading it and exploring it. Well, it is up to you know if you want to take the risk of further reading or avoid the risk of not knowing what is in the post. If you decide to read further, I request to share your comments/experience on the blog. Now I am going to share with you 6 Steps to take more risks in life and get closer to your dreams.

1. Start believing  that  taking Risk is beneficial

First Step is to understand that Risk is great. Risk does not mean only negative consequences. Risk offers innovation. When you were a baby and were trying to take first walk, at that very moment you took a risk. You did not how to walk, or how to take a step, or how to be in balance and avoid falling. But you took a RISK. You did not know how, why but you did. Of course, your parents /elders supported you and encouraged you to take steps and let you fall down at least couple of times before you could walk. Perhaps you fall many times.

I urge you to stop here for a moment and imagine your life if you would have not taken the risk of taking first step.  What would have been your typical day without knowing how to walk?

If you have not imagined and reached to this line, STOP it. Make a pause of 15 seconds and think “How would have you spent your today without walking?” Once you have imagined, you can go to the next line.

Do you want to life that life? I am sure nobody wants to live that life.

Albert Einstein said in 19945, – “A ship is always safe at the shore – but that is NOT what it is built for.” 

Life without you taking risk of first step would be like a ship standing at shore. Apple would not have invented the iPhone if Steve Jobs would have not have taken the risk. So taking risk is a great opportunity in life and one should take risk in life.

2. Access risk damage

What if I am wrong. What is the worst thing going to happen if I am wrong? Now this might sound scary but it is good to consider it. Is it life threatening? Is it something you can absorb and live with it? You don’t want to walk on rail track with blindfolded as risk damage is too high. So it is very important to access risk damage. What is the risk if you take a different route tomorrow when you leave home for office tomorrow? It would not be wise to take a different route on the day of an important meeting but it is fine on a normal day. What is the risk of taking bungee jump if you have a family of 5 person and only earning member? What is the risk of ordering a new dish in restaurant? So Access risk damage and evaluate if it is worth it. It may sound negative but it is worth considering it.

3. Minimize Risk damage

Once you have access risk damage in earlier step, you can minimize negative consequence and enhance positive benefits. In the earlier quoted example, if you have an important meeting in morning and do not want to be late for office, you can minimize risk damage by taking a different route on the day when there is no meeting planned or leaving home 30 minute early on a normal day.

When I choose start writing my blog last week (check my first post, What inspired me to start writing my blog?) I did not know if I am going to be regular in writing my blog. I did not know what I am going to write and when I am going to write. I took a risk. I was not sure if I want to share my thought and write a blog publicly. During a conversation with a fellow-participant of TEDx Zurich who has been a blogger since last few years, I learned that I can make my blog private. This minimized my risk and I decided to write my blog privately. In the end I did not make my blog private and kept public, but knowing that I can minimize the risk damage helped me in taking my actions.

4. Contemplate if you are right

This is BIG and my favourite. Visualize if you are right and you receive full benefits by taking this risk. If you are starting to start your business and afraid of taking risk, think what is possible if are a successful entrepreneur. How your life going to be? If you are thinking about reducing your weight and living a healthy life but afraid if you can do hard work and will lose your face with family members, visualize how slim you would be, what are the games you can play with your friends, spouse, and kids? How will you live your live? What is possible for you which is not for you right now? Just simply close your eyes and visualize your day after your have achieved your goal. Is it not worth taking risk?

Even if you do not achieve your goals by 100% and only achieve 50% or 60% right. Would not it be great? Because this is my favourite, I am going to write more about it. If you want to live your dreams, you have to lead your life. Agree or not you are a leader of your life. You lead your life in this world. What distinguishes a leader from a manager is – the ability of visualize. Be a leader and visualize your life with success.

I have personally have experienced this and enhanced my ability to take more risk over a period of time. Few years back, when I used to write code for applications, I used to wonder how senior leader of my organization can allocate money for project when we do not have details. Over a period of time, I learned that leader do not have exact details. They do not have how they are going to achieve the final goal. They do have overall vision and they work hard towards reaching goal. Of course, they leaders get failed many times but they minimize the effect by accessing risk damage (Step 3) and being in communication (Step 5).  So contemplate or visualize being right.

5. Communicate to people possibly affected (including you)

This is also very important. You have a lot of people in your life. Your life is intersects with other people in your life. Your parents, spouse, kids, friends, partner, relatives, office colleagues etc. If you are considering taking a big risk and results might affect their life, discuss the risks and potential outcomes and results with them.  You should also ask a question to yourself too. Can you live with outcome? Nobody likes negative surprise. Discuss with potential affected people (including you) and try to get their alignment or buy in. At least tell them so if they are prepared. Most of the times, you will receive valuable ideas to reduce probability and impact of negative outcome and to increase probability and impact of positive outcome. So communicate with people.

6. Measure regularly

This is something I find most of the people do not have or consistent in measurement. Reason- it is required mostly when thing are not going right.  Person taking action and measuring performance is same person, which is you. So when things are making progress, measurement provides minimal benefits. If you are not making progress then chances are you are not in a great space and not measuring your plans/results. So it does not help either. One of the ways I suggest to overcome this issue is to get a buddy. Ask someone to be your buddy who can be honest with you, challenge you, and make you responsible. Set/up some ground rules on what is acceptable for your buddy to ask and what is not. Minimal, you expect from him is to track progress of your plan, ask for deadline, and show you true picture of your Goals which sometimes you don’t want to see by yourself. Looking at current and accurate picture of your results allows you to adapt your goals with reality.

So in summary, 6 steps are:

1. Start believing  that  taking Risk is beneficial
2. Access risk damage
3. Minimize Risk damage
4. Contemplate if you are right
5. Communicate to people possibly affected (including you)
6. Measure regularly

What was the one risk which you took that completely changed your life? What happened? How did it change your life?

What inspired me to start writing my blog?

Seriously I can’t believe that I am writing my personal blog. I have been thinking about writing my blog from couple of months and today is the day!!!! So what changed today? Today, I attended TEDx Zurich 2013 a full day event where various inspiring people came on staged and talked. Well we all read inspiring books, see inspiration video and create a action lists which disappears in few days. So I looked deeper and discovered another interesting reason which is I happened to talk to someone who blogs. We chatted for several minutes and I found that he started blogging 2-3 years back. I even did not look for his blog as he writes in German but meeting someone who has been in similar situation provided the push I needed. My today’s experience validates my belief that you are who you talk with.

I encourage you to pick up an item which is in your to do list since days or months or years and find a friend, mentor, coach or someone who has an experience which could be useful in taking a baby step for your goal/action.

What event/experience made you start you blog or something else which was is your to do list since days/months/years? Leave your comments please….